The year 1998 brought a big change. We were finishing Class 10 and leaving our familiar Mount Carmel School. We had spent over a decade here. We would be missing our wonderful teachers and friends. But yes, we were excited, too. Excited to start in a new school, with new teachers, in a new environment. And yes, this was the first time that we girls were going to be placed in a co-educational setting! By this time, I was a a full-time feminist! I was fully geared up to face the misogynistic local culture. I was both aware and conscious of my fundamental rights. I knew that no one had the right to make be feel uncomfortable or attack my self-esteem. One thing I kept in my mind all the time : Expect Respect. I knew no one has the right to judge me, unless professionally required to (e.g., my teachers).
After the ISCE board examinations, we had about 4 weeks of break, with absolutely nothing to do. Dad taught me a new skill : driving a car! We started on the 2-acre field of the Bhratri Sangha club, and then proceeded to the road. I picked up slowly but steadily. By the end of the year, I was also riding his scooter. By then, I was 16 and had become stronger to handle the heavy machine (LML Vespa). Dad and Mom had always instilled independence and confidence in us. They stressed on self-reliance and self-sufficiency under all circumstances. They taught us the basic Mantra of life : Khud par bharosa karo (Believe in yourself).
In April 1998, we reached De Nobili School, Digwadih, situated next to Mount Carmel School. Father Chandy was the Principal, and Mr. T. Benedict was the Vice-Principal. It was a long 3-storey building with a separate 5-storey science block (which housed the Canteen, the Library, and the three Science labs). There was a big playground in front of the building. On the other side, there was a big auditorium (Xavier's Hall), a basketball court, a volleyball court, and then a huge open ground leading to the Junior section of the school. The premises occupied a bigger area than Carmel. It also had more strength per batch : each class had 3 sections. Only classes 11-12 had two sections : A (Science) and B (Commerce). Uptil class 10, it was an only-boys school.
The orientation was conducted by Father Coelho. We had a new uniform now : red-and-white-check salwar kameez and white starched dupatta, white socks and white shoes. We wore the school monogram (saying "Vidya Dadaati Vinayam") on our left shoulder. On Wednesdays, we had to wear white salwar kameez. The classes began from the next week. This school had a slightly different schedule. After the first three periods, there was a tiffin break of 20 min. After another three periods, there was a 10 min break again. The 8th period was always for games for all batches. The classroom of Class 11 was in the first floor. The chairs had an attached hinged desk. A portrait of Tagore hung on the back wall. Class 12 was at the ground floor.
I had five subjects to study : Physics (Mr. Parijat Kumar, after two teachers left), Chemistry (Ms. S. Raman), Maths (Mr. Dilip Mukherjee), English (Mr. Bernard Pandey, who was also our class teacher for 2 years), and Bengali (Ms. Usha Gupta). Students in the Biology stream had Mr. T. Benedict and Ms. C. Benedict. Some students had computer-science classes. Our Physics lab was conducted by the no-nonsense Ms. Pratibha Chatterjee. We had our science laboratory classes on Wednesday afternoons in Class 11 and on Thursday afternoons in Class 12. I particularly like the titration experiments and ion-analysis in the Chemistry Lab. Shakespeare returned as "Hamlet". I confess I did not know the story beyond the third act of this famous play till the end of Class 12. Bengali had another Drama "Chandragupta", which I could not like much. We had all the five classes everyday, Monday through Friday. I used to look forward to the classes, which were good, especially the Chemistry class by Ms. S. Raman (with whom I am still in touch). Whenever there was a free period, we six Maths girls went to the library. I also learnt to play the synthesizer, guided by Mr. Ashim Tesra. In the farewell function to Class 12, I sang "The Top of the World" using it.
Unfortunately, I noticed the following things about the class boys in general :
(a) They had poor communication skills. They were either (mostly) shy or snooty.
(b) They had poor soft skills. They did not know how to talk to girls normally. They were uncomfortable seeing girls as classmates.
(c) They were judgmental. They incessantly passed comments on girls based on their looks and behavior, some even going to body-shaming. Girls were sperm-receptacles for them.
(d) They talked patronizingly and condescendingly with girls. Assertive, non-appeasing, and uncongenial girls made them uncomfortable; and then gave knee-jerk misogynistic reactions. They had not seen confident women with strong minds. Girls were second-class citizens for them.
(e) They tried to take advantage of girls' hard-work (e.g., one of them stole my English essay and was about to submit it as his own, before I snatched it back from him, in public!).
(f) They had an innate need to show-off and 'prove' themselves, not realizing that they are themselves victims are patriarchy.
I could interact only with Debashis Maji, Sriramachandra V, Satyam Khaitan, and Namit Kumar; and stayed in touch with them even 15 years later. Boys, you disappointed us (sigh!).
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The most appalling was the behavior of the girls. (It made me realize why I can rarely make friends with females). They considered whatever the boys said as gospel truths. They allowed the boys to talk down upon them. They were very conscious of their bodies, their dress, their presence in a male-dominated environment. They tried to be as invisible and as inaudible as possible. No one opened their mouths in the class. They always were in groups, for 'safety'. One group regularly spent the recess breaks in the 2nd floor ladies restroom, and spent those precious 20 min being themselves, talking and laughing their hearts out. The boys used to give labels to the girls. Body-shaming was common. However, one girl said, "Since we are born as girls, at least this much we have to tolerate from the boys"!!!! In short, the girls never knew how to rightfully occupy their place under the sun. They existed, but only within the bounds of patriarchy.
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In this year, I started the correspondence course by the Chennai-based 'Brilliant Tutorials' for preparation for the various college-entrance examinations. Every month, there used to be a 'Set' of study material delivered home by post, with unending challenging problems to be solved in the exercises of every topic in Physics, Chemistry and Maths. Also, there were spot-tests held once every 3 months, interspersed with 2-day face-to-face classes. I appeared for these tests and classes in Kolkata, in the National High School for Girls, Kalighat; and in the Bhawanipur Education Society College, Rabindra Sadan; respectively. By this year, I had become independent enough to travel from Sindri to Kolkata by myself. From Sindri, I took the passenger train to Dhanbad Junction first, which was a 50 min ride. Then I took a 5-hour Express train too Howrah Junction. Alternately, I sometime took a 1-hour trekker ride from Rorhaband (Amar Club stop) till the Dhanbad Railway Station. Dad's childhood home was now fully renovated and modernized, and we began staying there during our Kolkata visits, instead of staying at my nanihaal. There was limited furniture and a makeshift kitchen, but we managed.
During the Puja vacation, we travelled to Bagdogra to meet Didi in her cantonment for a week. It was beautiful view of the Himalayas from her Officers' Mess. She took us around in the 158 Base Hospital. We met several officers from the Army Medical Core. Jawans moved around throughout the day and saluted my sister on passing by (as we watched with mixed awe and amusement). We also visited Mirik for a day in a big group. A few weeks later, my sister got engaged to her college senior Capt. Shubhojeet Chatterjee, whom she met at Bagdogra earlier that year.
1999 began with a worrying news. Didi's internship was over at Bagdogra, she has been promoted as a Captain in the Indian Army, and had been posted in Leh, Ladakh. This was when dad installed an STD phone at home. Until then, we needed to queue in a PCO to contact her and pay heftily for a 2-min conversation; or had to visit family friends like D. Ray Kaku and Dutta Kaku (who owned STD phones) to call her up. Another bad news came up in March 1999. Shubhojeet's father was diagnosed with blood cancer. His chemotherapy began in the Eastern Command Hospital Kolkata. This year also witnessed the Kargil war for 2 months. We were glued to TV news. We prayed for my sister, who was in the Kiari Field Ambulance, upstream from Leh along Indus. Thankfully, she did not have to face action. Her wedding preparations began in Kolkata. Just a month before the date, Shubhojeet's father expired from Hepatitis B. Gloom descended on us. Yet, the wedding happened as planned, on November 23rd, 1999. Soon after, my sister left for Lucknow to attend the 6-week long MOBC (Medical Officer's Basic Course).
Class 12 ended with the ISC examinations, but I had several College entrance Examinations knocking on my door. The biggest one was IIT-JEE, the Joint Entrance examination conducted by all the (then) 6 IITs across the country. It was tough. Damn tough. It was in two parts : a screening test in January and a Main Examination in May. I cleared the first one but could not crack the second. My weak point was Mathematics. After a streak of successful academic performance for 5+ years, this was the first time I faced failure. Disaster struck. I was extremely disappointed, almost depressed. It felt the end of the world. What is the future of my education?
The "drop-year" (2000-2001): I was determined to reach IIT. I decided that it was worth attempting its entrance exam once again. After a month-long break post the disaster, I started my studies again in July 2000. I got more material from Brilliant Tutorials for studying got IIT-JEE2001. I studied three new books : IIT Physics (Gupta and Gupta), IIT Chemistry (Agarwal and Agarwal), and TMH Maths for IIT-JEE. I had never worked this hard before. It was an unprecedented amount of effort put in, for 10 months. I solved as many question papers from the previous years as possible. The screening test was in December 2000, when I cleared (like last time). Then began the 5-month excruciating preparation for the Main Examination. I studied for 10-12 hours per day. I stopped all entertainment (which was minimal to begin with) and socializing (friends had anyways Sindri left for their respective colleges). My Sister was posted in the Command Hospital Kolkata after her MOBC, and my Brother-in-Law (BIL) had left for AFMC, Pune for his 3-year MD in anesthesiology. I also studied Mathematics from a local college lecturer for a few months to improve my skills. The Exam date (May 06, 2001) was declared and the admit card came in. I was nervous. I knew it was now or never. I answered the exam in the Public Service Commission Building, Rabindra Sarovar, Kolkata. Dad sat outside the building for the whole day as I wrote three exams of 2 hours each. In the same months, I answered various other entrance examinations. Then, I waited for the results.
Finally, on 1st June 2001, the IIT-JEE results were declared and I was ranked 2262 All-India. Later that month, I appeared for the counseling at Indian School of Mines (ISM) Dhanbad, and in a few days, I was allotted the 5-year integrated B.Tech plus M.Tech course in Ocean Engineering and Naval Architecture at IIT Kharagpur. Life got a quantum jump. A new 5-year plan began!
...........to be continued.
2 comments:
Ma'am please complete the story and upload the part4.. I'm waiting... Currently I'm residing at Sindri
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