Monday, December 6, 2021

What men have told me in the last 20 years

  1. "Please grow your hair long. I don't like your bob cut."
  2. "Join the gym. People make fun of me saying Main moti ke saath ghoomta hoon".
  3. "The children will carry my surname. And I will not allow any middle name from the mother".
  4. "We are breaking up, but now don't try to find someone from this campus. Everyone wants 'fresh'."
  5. "I want my wife to leave home for work after I leave, and be home before I return from work."
  6. "It is but expected that the women will shift to the husband's house upon marriage."
  7. "Commit nahin kar sakte...."
  8. "You have big ones......" (a friend after a hug : he was referring to my breasts).
  9. "Arre woh to slut hain....." (random judgmental contemporaries : simply because I dated more than one person in my 5 years in college).
  10. "Go and help my mother in the kitchen. She is old now" (ex-husband while watching  a match on TV himself).
  11. "Paani pilaao"(my teenage male cousin ordering me while himself playing).
  12. "Are you Miss or Mrs?" (An insurance agent in my office, while filling up the form).
  13. "A lady cannot take care of the hostel gym". (Admin officer in my first job).
  14. "I hope you will drive only inside the campus" (the car salesman while I was buying my first car).
  15. "Don't you get scared while driving on the highway?" 
  16. "Tum kaali ho, moti ho, big-breast wali ho; kaun tumhare taraf dekhega?!"
  17. "Bhabhiji, Sir ghar par hain kya?" (maintenance people when I open the door for their plumbing / electrical / sanitary appointment inside my house)
  18. "If you don't listen to me, I will share your morphed image in DC++".
  19. "Decorating the house, laying out plates, and serving food is anyways expected of girls. What's the big deal?"
  20. "I love you" (ex-husband only while starting sex : otherwise he did not even make proper eye contact).
  21. "My wife should not talk about her work at home".
  22. "My wife not changing her surname to mine will be my insult in my friends circle".
  23. "Does your daughter know to sweep and mop the floors?" (A prospective groom's father to my father : my father blasted the hell out of them).
  24. "As soon as you fulfill the requirements for a permanent position in the job, we will try for a baby". (Another prospective groom).
  25. "My siblings will be my priority over my wife (Another prospective groom).
  26. "What work did you do my house? Nothing!" (Ex-husband; even after me cooking, dusting, washing the dishes, cleaning the toilet, arranging Pujas, etc., etc.).
  27. "The problem is your daughter's higher salary. (A prospective groom's father to my parents).
  28. "Your daughter writes in her blog she will not wear sindoor and bangles. (A prospective groom's sister to my mother).
  29. "Please ask you daughter to wear a saari when we visit your house". (Another prospective groom's mother to my mother : my mother asked them not to come).

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